Thursday, October 29, 2009

In Gauge Meant

*Big sigh.*
Engagement Parties are hard. I mean, I'm glad my sister's getting married and everything, and I'm so happy for her. But I feel like I've been working non-stop all week. And I know that my mum (and my sister) would say that that's ridiculous, and that I've hardly done any work at all and all that. But seriously. I'm tired. Really, really tired. And I have a non-stop headache. Consistent. Constantly. It's only a little bit frustrating, waking up in the morning, sitting up in bed and discovering, "Oh, right, headache still here." Hand to head, wince, get out of bed anyway, to be confronted with more work.

Ok, the thing is, this happens. When we have parties, this happens. And we have parties. We have a really party-friendly house. It's just the way our house is. So we have parties. And this stuff happens. But I just finished Year 11, right, last Friday. And, granted the year wasn't as long as it normally is, but it was long enough, and busy enough, that I was really relieved to have a week off to relax. But there's been minimal relaxation time. And yes, I know my mum is incapacitated at the moment, due to surgery, but what about my entire life?

See, I'm starting Year 12 next Wednesday. And to be honest, I'm not really looking forward to it. After we were lectured at, about how we should be doing three hours of homework a night, five nights a week in Year 12, and how we should fit in 36 hours of homework over the summer (yeah, sure, 36 hours spread of 6 weeks, no big deal, right? That's more hours than are in an entire day), the summer which I always thought was supposed to be a break from school: sorry, my bad.

When do I get a break?! When do I get to just... I don't know. Chill for two seconds without someone screaming at me to do something?

I can't do it anymore. I'm drained. I'm done. I'm just... dead. I cannot do it anymore.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

I Belong to You

Wow. The last five months have been a super journey, and I haven't even been documenting them. How stupid is that! Wow, remind me to document the next year of my life... it's gonna be a big one.
So. I finished Year 11 last Friday. Or, well, I guess I actually finished on Wednesday, when I finished all my exams, but my last day of being in Year 11 was last Friday. And I have to say, it feels good to have that over and done with.
With Year 12 looming on the horizon, which is getting closer and closer (it's actually next Wednesday, as we're starting the year early to get more work done), I feel like maybe it's all just a bit too much. It's not the only thing I'm dealing with right now... in fact, it's not even the most important thing I'm dealing with right now. But I am dealing with it, or I will be in a week.
And what else can I do? Quit school? Not an option. So, I guess I'll just deal.

The thing is, the great thing is, I'm not alone. And God says He won't ever give us more than we can handle, with His help. So...

I'll deal.

P.S. OmigoshmysisterisgettingmarriedandIcannotwaittilltheweddingeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!